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Chicken is a large mammal that arose out of the sea in the year of 1776 to celebrate the winning of British in the Revolutionary War. Sadly, the British did not win, and the chicken was so dismayed that it threw itself onto a fire. The smell was so delicious that it caused many people to come running. They all took a bite of the chicken, but were not satisfied. They invented stem-cell research in order to create more chickens. They cross-bred giraffes and whales and ended up with a chicken-type entity. They decided that that was the best they would probably ever do and stopped working on it and cancelled stem-cell research. The technology to obtain stem cells from mustache hair was lost forever. While the government was cleaning the large mess of giraffe and whale pieces, the Mexican army invaded and stole the chicken, leaving only a playing card with the face of a Joker on it. The Americans attempted to use the power of stem-cells to create sharks that shot out fricken-laser beams, but they couldn't remember their own technology. They eventually resorted to inventing a rocket-powered steam boat that could plow through land at a rate of 1 bushel to the gallon of chocolate milk. After the first boat was finished, the technology to use chocolate milk as a fuel was mistakenly destroyed by a misfired Nerf pellet as a prank on the inventor. The only logical answer the Americans could think of to retrieve their chicken, was to declare war on Mexico. They didn't follow through and never got their chicken back. THE END